Rewards Programs T-Shirts

"I used the credit card that replaces lost merchandise."

"How are you finding our 'Agent Reward' scheme?"

'I've got to say a divorce lawyer with a rewards program is unusual.'

"I got a gold star for going the longest without looking at my phone in class."

'If you can keep him clean for a day you can sleep in his bed tonight.'

"Carrots just didn't get me going anymore, so I switched to chocolate instead..."

"So, it's agreed - we lay off the stick and hit them hard with the carrot."

Dangling Carrots

"Good news, sir – your carry-on has been upgraded to business class."

'I brought in a big order and my boss gave me a feather for my cap.'

'He's a control freak but the treats are good.'

"This is as far as your air miles take you."

Monkey casino study.

'Isn't it how you learnt to swim?'

'And how many frequent flyer miles do you have?'

If you apply for my credit card, you can earn points toward your next guilt trip.

"Wow, you've got tons of loyalty points. Someone's a good boy!"

'Your honor, my client requests the maximum bail possible so that he can post it with his frequent-flier credit card.'

"I always choose immediate gratification over vague rewards at some unspecified time in the future."

"Awesome, yes - but what's the point? I mean, aside from the travel reward points."

'My wife's left me for a man with more Nectar points...'

"Use the platinum card—I need the miles."

Giftbags in Heaven and Hell.

Penalty Box. Shouldn't there also be a "reward" box? I've been nice most of the game!

"Do I get the reward if I hand myself in..?"

"You said you wanted something really rewarding for your last wish so I made you a teacher."

'Is it wrong to accept a loyalty card from more than one supermarket, Father?'

Superheroes: 'Will work for Air Miles.'

'Welcome - would either of you like to join our Frequent Sinner Programme?'

"Complete the Nelson deal without delay or complication and this peanut is yours."

"When I think of the things I used to do for stickers, I feel like such an idiot."

"Thank you for your participation in our loyalty rewards program!"

Wait, don't forget your punch card - If you visit five more times, you get a free secret of the universe!

Loyalty Card

"I didn't know we had to take an oath with their loyalty card."