Resume Strategist Mugs

'When you said on youe resume you were a hacker, I had imagined something else.'

'How's getting you a sandwich going to help me get a job?'

'According to your resume, you've accomplished very little and left no paper trail. Very impressive.'

"Tell me about the bar codes and sales prices on the back of your certification diplomas."

"$120,000 in student loan debt, and you're telling me I need to dumb down my resume?"

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

'Williams, we're not used to receiving such excellent ideas as these, so we'd like to tone them down a bit.'

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

"I don't like getting bogged down in details. I'm more of a big-picture guy."

'It has come to my attention that we need to hedge against our five-year plan.'

Nothing Succeeds Like Confidence.

"The trend in tough economic times is to put off everything that doesn't require immediate action ? as this chart shows."

'Smith, we need more creativity. You have to learn to think outside the box.'

'Very impressive educational background...now let's discuss WHO you know.!

'Ah, Galagher, we made good use of your proposal.'

"Any questions?"

'Now, keep in mind that these numbers are only as accurate as the fictitious data, ludicrous assumptions and wishful thinking they're based upon!'

"Dammit, Johnson. You've got to start thinking outside of the box."

"...but the big question is, does the competition know that we don't know what we don't know?"

Empty box of ideas

The Evolution of the Bonus

'I want you to paddle against the current.'

"We have an acronym!"

Eureka!

"#Win!"

Bright idea

Busy Workload Today and Especially Tomorrow

'You really want that promotion, don't you, Sherman?'

A presenter with a very complex chart to explain a business plan - 'And it's as simple as that!'

"Is it just a scary coincidence that the words 'changes' and 'unknown' both have 7 letters?"

After a day long meeting, the decision, as usual, is made in the hallway.