Resume Rhapsodist Mugs

'I went to Harvard until they found out I was there.'

"Yes, we do accept resumes online, but there's more to it than giving me your computer with your resume on it."

One of the failed candidates for the copyrighters job wants to know 'wat was rong with his applicashun'.

'The grammar's awful and the spelling's atrocious - otherwise it's an impressive CV.'

"It's translated from French, so where it says 'Harvard Business School' it may mean 'jail.'"

'I'm working because I've been upgraded. He never upgraded so he's out of work.'

"These are excellent qualifications... so good that our largest competitor would gladly pay you twice as much."

Laid off from a dot-com? Ask about our resume-writing software.

Great Poets of Catalogdom

Poetry Buff.

'I have never seen a resume prepared in pastels and oil paint. How long have you been unemployed?'

Your performance since you came here suggests you may have lied on your resume.

"References? Well, I just got six references from the guys in your waiting room."

"Never gets old: yes, 'See you in a while'..."

'My resume,...in rap form!'

'Let me start by saying I wish I had your imagination...'

"I've got some skills - I'm just not sure they add up to a 'set.'"

'A resume painted in oils on canvas? How long have you been out of work?'

"Permission to speak in rhyming couplets, sir!"

'If you want to see my resume, it's on my cave wall.'

'I'll stop saying you've changed jobs too many times if you'll stop giving me notice.'

"A vibrant imagination is an excellent quality for the job...but not the CV."

"The whole thing is basically fiction. But I just thought my resume could use some spice."

Renaissace Music Lovers

'Darlin', what's an adjective for a two-timin', heart-breakin' outlaw that rhymes with iPod?'

'But you got a second interview, that's something.'

"Your resume was good, up until the point where you said, 'Don't make me beg.'"

'... and I especially like this attribute... 'an immigrant's work ethic'.'

'Sorry, but I have to put 'Orca': Who would hire a 'Killer Whale'?...'

'I haven't gotten to your story yet. I'm laughing at your resume.'

'Poet Laureate' door 'Gone to lunch-back twixt 2 &3'

'Bob, we know that you can do the job, even though you did exaggerate your resume.'