Responsible Pet Owner Pillows

"Yes, I'm a dog person. How did you know?"

No littering...

"This is why I want you to remember the three most important words in the world: spay, neuter, adopt."

"... and I have a follow-up question regarding rawhide."

"Those aren't coconuts, they're tennis balls." "Sweet mother of Novak Djokovic!" The island of lost tennis balls.

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

Indoor Climbing Centre for Cats.

"Pick me!"

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

'I know you're really proud, dear. But, don't you think people might think you're bragging?'

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

Wally Begins research for his thesis entitled "who's a good dog?"

"Foster failure"

"We can see through the troposphere, stratosphere, mesosphere and into all those distant stars up there in outer space... truly remarkable, huh, girl?"

'I wonder if they have any water filters?'

'When he's happy he can cool the entire downstairs.'

"But everyone is befuddled by math."

Dog looks perplexed as man has his head out the window taking in the beer smells.

Dog Hunting Trophies.

"It get it – you're hungry."

"Lemme know when you’re ready to howl at it."

"Bad dog! I've told you to always proofread."

"Oh no, after you. I insist!"

"Why, you little Shih Tzu."

Thanks to her cat-cam, Cheryl was able to keep her furniture from being shredded while she was at work.

"I didn't know she could body surf. Did you know she could body surf?"

"Hold my calls, Kimberly. I'm with a ball of string."

'Yessir, Ben us fly fisherman answer to a higher calling.'

"Barking sometimes helps me relax. But then it drives the neighbors crazy."

"And where have you previously moused?"

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

'Table scraps, doggie-bag goodies, dropped hot dogs, the cat's dish of food and your master's slippers.'

Dog Nightmares

I'm at the shrub with the empty bag of pretzels we sniffed last week. Where are you?

Haute Suture