Research Presentation Pillows

'May I say it's a great pleasure to present my work to such a distinquished assembly of my colleagues.'

'We need to mask the lack of substance in the presentation with fancy graphics and animations...'

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

'Dr.Sall Thompson got so excited over the new spring design she took a quantum leap!'

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

Fear/Knowledge

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

"We're bringing the arts and sciences together here by giving crayons to mice."

'Never mind inspiration. I need background material on atomic physics.'

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

'I'm Jeremy's father. I'm a computer consultant and I'm unemployed.'

Wally Begins research for his thesis entitled "who's a good dog?"

"Waiting for the vaccine launch."

Can't Do the Math/Won't Do the Math.

'I pledge allegiance to the atom, and to the periodic table on which it stands, many particles indivisible, with orbitals and electrons for all.'

"You're going to have to submit to peer review eventually, Bradshaw!"

"Now that I have everyone's attention..."

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The Science of Love

Postgraduates A group of posts on their way to class.

"Not only pharmaceuticals - we're also finding all sorts of industrial chemicals here."

Molecular Biology and Cosmology buildings

"The trend in tough economic times is to put off everything that doesn't require immediate action ? as this chart shows."

"I'm razzled, but not dazzled."

He may have a PH.D in elementary particle physics, but he's having an awful lot of trouble with the application form.