Rental Properties T-Shirts

"A voice is telling me to move."

"Thank goodness I'm only renting."

"...and there's a $30 monthly balloon animal pet fee."

'There goes any chance of us getting our security deposit back.'

"I'm a real estate developer and I'm just looking over this area."

'We did have one property in your price range, but I'm afraid we sold it in 1943.'

"And these are the Andersons, our tenants."

House hunting is cruel.

"This spectacular 40 room property has majestic views of the valley and village and it was tastefully renovated after the most recent Viking incursion."

"I need an apartment just big enough for a laptop, a coffee cup, and me."

"The landlord has promised to sort out the damp problems."

Letting agent on the phone: 'OK, so there's fungus in the bathroom - but on the plus side, it IS organic.'

"Let's see - you might be just right for a little 2-turret, 1 1/2 moat unit I'm renting on West 58th street."

The lessor of two evils.

"It's a new rent concept - fifteen minutes for a quarter."

"The previous tenant has gone away for a very long time."

It's a nice apartment but I don't want to pay my share of the national debt for rent.

'Here is the lead-based paint information, Fair Housing criteria, laws regarding tobacco use outdoors, slip-and-fall warning, and, barring any further public hysteria, the lease itself.'

'Sorry...I don't deal with lease issues.'

'I'm presuming by the amount of rent you're asking for, it includes a full-time butler, maid and gardening staff!'

'Sorry, my dog says no landlords allowed!'

'Water is included with rent.'

'Here is the lead-based paint information, Fair Housing criteria, laws regarding tobacco use outdoors slip-and-fall warning, and barring any further public hysteria, the lease itself.'

Tenants and Landlords - 'Are we nearly there? ...'

"He's moving out when he's saved up enough for a deposit on a flat."

"It's a modest studio flat with own garden, 30 minutes from central London."

Leonard Cohen calls his landlord

Generation Rend. Young man rending his garments in anguish at extortionate rents.

"Well, thank God it's not the plumbing! Let's run down town, drop off a check and sign that lease!!"

"Considering the rental market, this property offers a fantastic view, and they'll drop the restrictions."

Landlord holding back a tennant from his money: 'It's all part of the service!'