Reluctant Patient Mugs

"My physical therapist says this is the worst possible position you can lie in."

"Dr. Garcia is ordering to make a lot of changes in my life."

"Maybe next week when I'm feeling a little better."

"I’ve got to take this. It’s someone who isn’t obsessed with summer fun."

"I got tired of 'Moby-Dick' taunting me from my bookshelf, so I put it on my Kindle and haven't thought of it since."

Mall Directory: You are here, but your mind is somewhere else.

"Homework! Homework! Homework! I'll be doing this for hours! Talk about a misspent youth."

The middle school mile claims its first victim.

Desk boxes: 'In', 'Out', and 'What ever'.

"You don't get a lot of work done, Jenkins, but I admire how thoroughly unstressed you are."

"Sorry... My School Aversion Syndrome is totally bad today."

'I don't want to go school shopping! Can't you just buy stuff for me?. . .Just get me more of this in the next size up!'

'Liquor will solve this problem, chief!'

Hot flashes

'No, officer, I'm not a homeless beggar. I'm just waiting on my wife while she's shopping.'

Stop staring at that screen saver!

'Before I read the investment committee's report - I would remind everyone that I never asked to be on this damn committee.'

'I'm sorry I didn't come to work yesterday, sir -- somehow, it seemed like Sunday.'

"Enjoy my first day at school? You mean there'll be others?"

"I have to write a book report for school. . . do you have any books with lots of pictures?"

"Son, we didn't spend a fortune on your education so you can 'just be yourself.'"

'Before I read the investment committee's report - I would remind everyone that I never asked to be on this committee.'

'Dad, do you really think trying to sell me life insurance counts as quality time?'

"I hate these walkabouts. Did you remember to get me some corn plasters?"

'I couldn't decide what to wear to work so I just didn't go.'

Why men hate shopping.

"The boss is on a working vacation and we're on a nonworking vacation."

'Who cares where Waldo is?'

"The only thing I like more than running is everything else."

Man Readig Paper

Summer Reading

"No need to rush back to work. The office lad is doing your job."

"Mom, don't believe it. It's Fake News."

'Don't worry, Mom - I'll do my book report during the next commercial.'

The Imperfect Hostess