Reluctant Gardener Mugs

"How to deal with weeds."

Bob tried living off the land. But the land soon got tired of Bob not pulling his weight, and kicked him out.

How to deal with weeds

"I had a great result with my garden this year. Not a thing survived."

Half-A**ed Publishing Presents...

'He claims to be a recovering workaholic.'

'I'm out of bags.'

"I have a low-cost project you can which you can involve yourself with."

"Would it kill you to clean up after yourself?"

"But you told me you were on gardening leave, so why can't you come and help me in the garden?"

"I #*#*#* hate gardening, I'd much rather be at work!!"

"Remember that half-dead sansevieria you put out on the balcony back in January of 1994, pal?"

Sophisticated garden - low maintenance garden

"I might let the window box lay fallow, this season."

"Declared Victory Garden"

"Now, that's my kind of gardener: somebody who grows dandelions! I love dandelions..."

'I must confess I admire people like you...Executives brave enough to say 'No I need a holiday.' I don't care if my clients look elsewhere, I'm not going to sacrifice my leisure time to climb the slippery pole to the very top...'

Pyramid Garden

"I switched hobbies from tropical fish to gardening. I won't feel so bad if I kill a plant."

A Vegetable Plot...

"Sorry, dear, but vowing NOT to climb Mount Everest this year isn't a valid New Year's resolution."

'We bought this bolt hole to get away from politicians talking green politics.'

"Well, it's a plan."

Now, this is a good garden: full of weeds! The likelyhood of somebody trying to poison us here is very low...

"I wish you wouldn't take your enjoyment so hard, Ed."

"How can I do the garden when you can see it's raining outside?"

A man moves to shoot the last leaf from a tree in autumn.

"You raised it from a mutant seed, you whack it."

'I'll kill that dog of yours.'

"I thought you'd like it. It's an orchid. pre-neglected!"

"I hate to break it to you, but I don't think that's a self-weeding garden. Technology has made you lazy."

This viewer contains strong language

'How are we supposed to sleep with that Dawn Chorus of lawn mowers...?'

Environmentally friendly woman putting slug killer down

None of my plants do well...but I forgot I had an onion in my refrigerator, and it's sprouting leaves and growing well.