Relocation To Remote Area T-Shirts

In and Out tray filled with messages in bottles on a manned desk on a desert Island

"Ahhh... close enough."

The fate of the emigrant

"Enough with how great the public schools are. Just tell us – is there a Trader Joe’s nearby?"

Angels await for their baggage around carousels.

'Great news, Dear! I've been traded to a think tank in California for a PhD Specializing in the Baltics!'

"Thanks! Carl put his heart and soul into it, along with, of course, lots of mud and a boatload of his own saliva."

"I always check 2 bags, but one's just a sacrifice to the luggage gods."

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

"Cancel the trip. The cook didn't get a visa."

"But if you leave New Orleans, you'll be just another sandwich."

You are here.

Walkers

Of course I always start off by wooing a prospective candidate with talk of stimulating work,great colleagues and a reasonable work life balance...but the winning argument is always when I promise them enough money to choke a rhino.

"I thought they just hibernated for the winter."

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

"The homes in this area are beautiful."

'WOW! This ladies' nav app is fantastic!'

While You Were Out: We Moved!

"This city is becoming unlivable."

"See, dear, it's only an owl hooting...."

Oh boy, lucky you were there: I was cramping up. I need a few minutes rest if you don't mind...

'Hmmph. Here's an ad for affordable housing five minutes from downtown. By what means? Learjet?'

"Ernie's full service salon and day spa."

'We like to spend 51 weeks of the year at our Florida holiday home...'

"I found the perfect job! You don't do any work, stay at home, make funny videos, and you get full salary and benefits!!"

Emigrating to France.

"My family argues so much over living in the city or country that it makes me feel like pulled pork."

'Old mother hubbard -- your cupboard is now bare.'

The Near Outback: Lenny and Samantha

"Today on Escape to the Country Emily & Oliver are looking for that special little property in the Cotswolds. So what exactly's going to tick all their boxes?"