Religious History Nerd Mugs

Facebook 33 A.D.

'Yes, all at once!'

'Yorick? No, I don't think so, unless of course he was a Neanderthal!'

'I'm sure he was a great guy, but there's a new Pharaoh in town.'

"I find that hugely offensive!"

"What? You broke number 3 already?"

"They're SUPPOSED to have a disparate impact!"

"I couldn't care less if being Homo Sapiens is the latest trend. While you're living in our cave, you better act like a true Neanderthal."

'You were great at 'Daniel in the Lion's Den!' -- I'd sure like to hear you do 'The Three Little Pigs' sometime!'

"What did Jesus order?"

The ecumenical dinner party.

"Believe me it's only an apple."

'You know, I never have had a sabbatical....'

"Excuse me, Reverend, but what, exactly, do you have to do to get a drink around here?"

10 Commitments? Sure, I guess I could give him those, too.

'Why did Moses wander in the desert for forty years?'

"Mark, you have to stop calling John's gospel 'Fan Fiction.'"

'I'll let your people go when they're fully pyramid-compliant!'

'Number three?', 'This is NOT a quiz!'

"There Adam. Isn't that a lot more comfortable than that silly little fig leaf?"

"No, the Trinity is not the Father, The Son, and the Preacher's wife."

"We're in luck, not a word about retrospectivity."

Moses parting the waves and trolleys appear on the sea bed!

"Perhaps it was too soon for a self-driving wheel."

To monk showing book entitled 'Brand Spanking New Testament': "I think we may have to shorten the title."

I've founded my own religion. Of course you have, Rudy. It's off to a good start. Already, it's being mocked by people of other faiths. If history's any guide, within a couple hundred years, it'll be widely accepted and people who don't believe in it will be persecuted. What are the central tenets of your religion? A true Rudian knows that life is suffering, and winning arguments online is salvation.

Surge Plans.

'I don't get it, I've only served that guy water all evening.'

'You can't recuse yourself from a war!'

Jane Austen Powers

Shakespeare actually had to paraphrase Julius Caesar's last words.

'Well if you don't want the apple, can I tempt you with this?'

E=MC2, 'You think you're pretty smart, don't you?'

Catholic-Protestant Debates. . .

USA-China, trade war.