Relationship Roller-coaster Rider Gifts

"Oh no! You, again?"

"Tunnel of love"

'When you said this movie's about a fish out of water, I was expecting more of a light-hearted comedy.'

Waterfall of Disappointment

Joe's Bar: Happy Hour 5-9, Utter Despair 10-12.

Mood swings: Swing 1 - 'Looks like it's going to be another wonderful day!' Swing 2 - 'Who CARES link brain! I hope it rains acid!!' Swing 3 - 'I think i'm going to CRRRY!'

Tragedy! When the feeling's gone and you can't go on.

'The trouble with Nigel is that he's so changeable. One minute I love him and the next minute I loathe him.'

"Wellness clinics, stress-management checkups, hypertension screenings, lab tests, crisis after crisis. Fibre foods, fish-oil capsules, unsaturated spreads, plaque. Say what they may, McCormack, we did it our way."

'We're in a hurry.'

'And you must be Hank, my husband's new business partner!'

'I thought Lobsters mate for life.'

Too Weird to Have a Husband

'Don't hate me just because I hate you.'

"I said our marriage was a 'go', Brenda. I didn't say it was a 'confirmed go'."

Sign reading "Bought High; Sold Low."

Real Time vs Emotional Time

Church Drive-Thru.

'She vacillates between PBS and PMS.'

"Are you trying to tell me something, dearest?"

"What is it about an unfavorable soccer outcome that makes me want to wreak immediate havoc in the streets?"

"Our little girl is growing up - this very morning she told me she hates me."

Bipolar Bear.

'I'm mad as hell, but also very apathetic.'

"He sounds like a papaya I bought that just went straight from green to rotten."

"Surely not zero tolerance?"

"That escalated and de-escalated quickly.'

"Jeremy called our relationship 'crunchy.'"

STRIP *The Fan * Thinking of ditching Coventry City

'Aaaawww...You're cute when you are wrong.'

Mood Swings.

Stock Market Index Fund and In case of Emergency Manic Depressive Therapy.

Arrivals and Departures

"It's all me, me, me, with you - it's like the world revolves around YOU all the time!"