Relationship Maven T-Shirts

'Ask him where he goes every December 24th - because he won't tell me!'

I told Francine we weren't seeing eye-to-eye and I had some things to get off my chest. I said she needs to help foot the bill until I can get a leg up. And now things are much better between us --- I think she was attracted to my body language.

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

Apples for sale

'We want everyone to remember our name.'

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

'A few more years in this job and you'll learn how to delegate stress.'

"So then the VP of Sales looks right at me and says 'Larry, what's going on? We don't have any traction in the market.' Like it's MY fault!"

"#Win!"

Creative department

'Let me see your portfolio of stolen ideas.'

"Does anyone here have a clue what it is we used to get?"

Direct Marketing...

'Once, long ago, I thought I was wrong...but it turned out I was mistaken.'

"I don't have to be a team player, Crawford. I'm the team owner."

"Business is booming! Come in and see our explosive sales today!"

The bad news is our boxer shorts are still bursting into flames. The good news is our brand recognition is through the roof

'Okay, okay, be patient!'

Corporate Team Building. Team. Hey, everybody, I've just been told our CEO fled the country while we've been doing our truth exercises.

Trade Show Sherpas

'I think it's time to rein in Henderson.'

'It's time to move out when Mom says...'

"Just go with the workflow."

'What can I do to create a climate where things get done?'

'It's perfect, but can we see it in white?'

Standard Life Aberdeen Rebrand

"Someone, call the office and see if we can get a fresh carrot."

Publisher. "The Laws of Motion " is a little dry for a title, Mr. Newton. How about something catchier like "When Push Comes to Shove"?

Tarzan has gone into advertising. He's king of the jingle now.

Real Estate Krisp Flakes: Location! Location! Location!

Your Guide to Winning Movember

'Sorry to interrupt Dixon - but this is not what I meant when I said this company needed more blue-sky thinking!'

"That was a great ideaof yours, chester."

Time Out For Teddy