Red Wine Appreciation Mugs

"Hmmm ... perhaps a pinot noir less spilly?"

A nice Chianti?

In the Guru District

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

Leaning Tower -After a bottle, Jean noticed the tower stopped leaning.

'A cheeky red?'

"And for my next trick. . . turning wine back into water."

Bacchus.

Sauvignon Bonk

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

'Sooner or later, someone at the party will hand you a sandwich and a glass of wine - then what?'

'... And this is my cellar.'

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

'We don't 'skimp' on the pour, sir; we're just generous with the glass.'

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

"Go ahead. Press one for more options."

'He's holding a sign saying he's marooned with 20 cases of La Tache. A second sign: drop a corkscrew and come back in six months.'

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

Yoga vs. Prosecco

"Maybe we should have brought a Riesling."

'Which wine goes best with 'the old man and the sea'?'

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

"Why did we run out of wine?! I'll tell you why...Mary's son brought 12 of his friends who crashed the wedding party! That's why!"

'One more for me an Tiffany, and one more for you and the road.'

'Dang! I never now if the sommelier is messing with me.'

'So it's the Mumm's Cordon Rouge, '98 Pouilly-Fuisse, '86 Chateau Margaux, and the '92 Barsac - would you like any food?'

Pasta

'Note to self: Like coffee, homemade coffee wine should be available in decaf, too.'

'No, you're not calling at a bad time. I'm a professional wine taster - it's alwasys a good time.'

'Wine, high octane grape juice.'

"He gets easily abstracted."

"I make it myself!"

'This is the last time we hire former Cirque du Soleil members as stompers.'

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."