Reality Tv Writer Prints

'The following program isn't really recommended for anybody, but hey — ratings are ratings!'

"You know, the original title of the show was too long."

Mike (The Situation) is rumored to have written the original manuscript for his best-selling memoir entirely out of bronzer.

"Davina McCall: Life at the Extreme takes a celebrity to the most extreme places on Earth!"

'This has the makings of their toughest season ever.'

Caution: Driver Watching "Hard Copy"

"I always thought I'd be good at getting drunk and crying on camera for Bravo."

'Bloody streakers - they have a lot to learn.'

"Britain's Got Talent is now in its tenth astonishingly brilliant year!"

"Here's the deal, boys. We need to see a little more bickering. We're doing a Reality Show."

'We're doing a fly on the wall documentary.'

"Welcome to Sugar Free Farm! The reality show, where celebs go cold turkey on their sugar addictions for two weeks."

'I just love this new reality show, TRADING BANK ACCOUNTS!'

America's funniest election gaffes

The 24-Hour Celebrities Doing Something Stupid Channel.

Derren Brown: Pushed to the Edge

A couple decides what to watch.

nstead of looking at fish bowl, a kid watches the fish on TV as they are being video taped.

Parents start infant on the way to fame.

"Last week on 'Top Surgeon' Erica won immunity, while Carl was sent home for killing his patient during routine gallbladder surgery."

"If there is no more American Idol what am I going to do to become famous?"

'Let's see what the employment tribunal has to say about that, shall we?'

"The 'Queer Eye' people came by - but they fled."

'I'm not sure how you managed to burn a bowl of cereal.'

'Noah, before you leave we'd like to have a word with you!'

'You're not being fired Jenkins. It's just that all our colleagues have booted you out of the company.'

'What a strange episode -- they just voted Ricardo Montalban off the island!'

'No, I've never been in a TV reality show. My reality is pretty well scripted by my wife, kids and boss.'

X Factor contestant dressed as a 'Y'.

"I wanted to deliver a message of hope and tolerance in a complex global society but I decided to update them on the Kardashians instead."

Death Styles of the Rich and Famous

"What's the best way to break up a marriage?"

'Dear, you're not supposed to take it seriously...it's a reality show!'

'Oh No! Reality theatre.'

The big questions in life.