Reality Questioner Pillows

If a tree falls on a philosopher in the woods, and no one is there to hear his screams for help, did he really make a sound?

"I know I'm real. I'm not certain about you."

"...I don't believe in the past or the future. I don't even believe in right now. Everyone remembers the past differently. Everyone imagines the future differently. Everyone even disagrees about what's happening right now. So who's to say tomorrow what you and I did tonight?"

Psychiatry. You're going to put me in touch with reality? --- What's my exit strategy?

'You're not fooling anybody but yourself.'

"This is the perfect way to watch movies if you love mosquitoes and having a cold, wet butt."

'Hey! Contemplate your own navel!'

"Well, either you're hopelessly optimistic or hopelessly short-sighted."

"I've never read such utter nonsense! There's a guy here reckons we're all living in some kind of computer simulation!"

Skeptic: Critical Thinking, Facts, Debunking.

Complexity Made Simple.

"My feeling is that while we should have the deepest respect for reality, we should not let it control our lives."

There are dreams...And then there's reality...

Objects in mirror bear no relation to reality.

"After spending thirty years creating models of early universe formation, I began to suspect that my work didn't make a shred of difference."

'Apparently, wild hopes and dreams, re-enacted by Barbie and Ken, are no substitute for a solid business plan.'

Lost and Profound.

"I'm starting to prefer the ones who don't believe in me."

"We've managed to eliminate every problem except the public perception that we're heading in the wrong direction."

Since I took command of the company, I have steered a steady course.

University of Hard Knocks

"Do you ever wish you lived in a different era, Randy?" "Well… every waking moment I wish I were living before the beginning of existence itself. So I could witness the Big Bang." "It's safer to keep me where I am. Injecting my advanced virility into more primitive eras could have disastrous effects on the timeline." "That way I could know for sure whether our universe is all just one big simulation running on some geek's computer." "I mean, everything being made up of atoms and math is

'If you want a reality check, I'll have to see two pieces of I. D.'

"All of my friends are imaginary."

"This says you should expect to spend six months and at least $800 building the perfect lowrider bike."

"So, tell me what happened after this Schrodinger put you in this box..."

Are You a True American Patriot?

'Yeah? Well... bite me! No... wait!'

'Dad, tell me again what life's about.'

"What's it all about?"

"Starting at a new agency can be overwhelming. Let me show you around."

Psychiatrist. She said she could help get me in touch with reality or boost my self-esteem but not both.

'I don't think therefore I'm not.'

"You can make your life any way you want it. Don't let your thoughts limit your future. It is possible to achieve your dreams!"

"I've been living vicariously through a really boring person."