Real World Skeptics T-Shirts

"I don't think you're being realistic."

'Item 56, we need to schedule a series of meetings to discuss whether we should have meeting to look at whether we're having too many meetings.'

Department of No One Could Have Anticipated

"I've never read such utter nonsense! There's a guy here reckons we're all living in some kind of computer simulation!"

"My feeling is that while we should have the deepest respect for reality, we should not let it control our lives."

'What is the meaning of poorly attended staff meetings.'

"It's a beautiful ring. She'll definitely pause for a moment before saying no."

'Love gets the credit, but business makes the world go round.'

"I packed the cooking gear like you told me, Dad...where do I plug it in?"

"No religious nuts!"

"Well, yes. It was love at first sight. But only because I was drunk at the time."

'Okay, now I'm hoping he's right...'

Advertising hoarding proposing marriage (which is rejected).

'It's a Surgeon-General's warning.'

'Everytime I kiss him he says he can't breathe.'

"What do you want to do for Valentine's Day?"

"Hon, this is Mr Atherton. He's going to show us how we can commercially exploit our marriage."

Boss: 'Speak up Smythe, I know you've got an opinion, I told you what it was in my email this morning!'

The first meeting.

“The children claimed to love nature, even as they warmed themselves by roasting the dismembered limbs of the tree’s mother.”

"Podcasts, blech. It's like eavesdropping without the intrigue."

"Spaghetti made from squash? Sounds like fake news."

"The test results are conclusive. He doesn't have a romantic bone in his body."

'From what I've been hearing about it, I'm not sure I want a grip on reality.'

'He's a very good doctor, and I trust him, but I must confess that I always double check his diagnosis on Google.'

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, lady, can't you read?"

Get rich today with cold fusion tomorrow! Invest now!: 'More like con - fusion! He's a con artist!'

Agnostics Society: Absolute worst place to ask for directions.

Go to meeting, Zoom, remote learning, embeddable video, skypting. . . and you still haven't mastered your VCR.

Cherub arrested.