Real Estate Rhetoric T-Shirts

Mortgage up: 'Where?.'

Estate Agent showing client his parents' house - '...and here's one from our affordable homes range'

An exaggeration of estate agents

'Did you auction off our house on eBay?'

'Someday, Son, all this will be your ex-wife's.'

'Now from this room you can get a great view of the whales going by!'

'Now, it does require some modernisation. . . .'

"Efficiency tombs available"

"The high price is due to the great view of the beach."

"This town ain't big enough for the both of us and, even if it was, I doubt either of us could afford to buy a place here given the current sellers' market."

'Here's the 2 acres of beachfront property you bought - too bad it's only six inches wide.'

"Come climate change, you could find yourself sitting beach-front on the French riviera."

'It mostly scares the realtors.'

"For sale £470,000 house included"

"Every once in a while this house comes with a pool."

"We figured why not make some money while we migrate south."

"As president of the tenants' association, I have to inform you that our list of grievances has been eaten."

"Yes, it's nice, but it's lost twenty per-cent of its value in the past year."

"No pressure, but I do have another couple who are very interested."

'There are no skeletons in the closets but you might have troubles with those in the back yard.'

Coming Soon- Trump Circle

Real estate.

'The previous owner broke his leash ...I mean, lease.'

'I'm so glad I moved into this basement flat Mary. It's put me on the property ladder and the neighbours are so friendly!'

"It's a bit of a fixer-upper."

'But your advert said, Fantastic view.' - 'She's out right now.'

This is our proposal for your new housing development. We've chosen to call it The Meadows.

"We're thinking of downsizing."

Toughing it out in the real estate game.

'Cosy little kitchen, isn't it?'

"Can I suggest a hoarder's house? It's perfect for a young family of rats to move in and share with the current owner..."

'With my new promotion, I can move us into a bigger shoe.'