Race Winner T-Shirts

Medalist wears five gold medals to form olympic rings.

Congratulations for male runner

Danger Slow Sand.

Knight in shining Lycra!

Sloth 10K.

"So that's where you were last night."

Tractor Racing

Prehistoric Peeps: Even the 'Derby' had its primeval counterpart.

Employee of the month...

'I think it's really tacky to make the salesperson of the month someone from another firm.'

Bradley Wiggins

Valentino Rossi (the Doctor)

'I want to thank my biological and surrogate Mother, my two Dads.. .'

I'm no longer welcome at the county fair.

'Think Basics.'

'I believe you were first.'

I guess I outta take science classes if I'm really going to help the environment. What for? You want to be a famous actress

'Mom, Dad, it's nice of you to visit me at the store, but you know, I am working.'

Once again, Daisy had won the 'Employee of the Month' award...'

Last place

"We ran into a marathon."

"He wins every year -- the man could sell an annuity to a mayfly."

"Never mind the carrot, where's my f*****g medal?"

Annual pursuit of free agents in the off-season.

'No, thanks. I'm fine.'

Tortoise & Hare.

Man Crosses Finish Line At Heaven's Pearly Gates

'My investment objective is to keep up with my neighbors, the Joneses, who just won the lottery.'

With Running Lanes/Without Running Lanes

Winning the around the world regatta was great, but taking that victory lap wasn't such a good idea.

"Well, for starters I'd like to thank me."

Tour de France champ Henri Pélissier

Fall Classic. You're way too literal, Ernie.

Ssomething tells me this award has gone to his head!

Dale Earnhardt Jr.'s personal hell.