Race Day Runner Pillows

"Hi, Mum, I'm last in the race, but I do have the best mobile."

'Your shoe's untied.'

'We might make more progress if we try working as a team.'

Famous Last Words: "Whew! Well, at least the worst is behind us."

A day at the races

Danger Slow Sand.

"You keep an eye on our horse. I'm checking to see if the bookie runs off with our money."

'Congratulations, you graduated.'

"Oh, oh, it seems they've had a little trouble with the hand-off in lane number three."

Women in a cross country race

'Humans seem to be so weight-conscious: My rider weighs himself before each race...'

9:00 - '' - '10:00' - '' - 'It's a 'spot the indifference' competition.' - '' -

Angler sees sign that says 'Good Spot'. He says, 'This looks like a good spot.'

'We're almost 1/8th of the way there.'

"I've got an office and I've got a window, but I wouldn't say I've got a window office."

'Stress'

'I hate running in the outside lane.'

"Did you see neighhhhhh...bours last night?"

Runner's High, Runner's Low

Bradley Wiggins

T-Rex Racing: A Short-Lived Sport

He won't stop talking about being the fastest ever. He's a broken record about breaking a record.

Wilfried Zaha

As you like it - One way of catching fish

Loser's Podium.

'I was this close to the finish line and then somebody threw a stick!'

Get a life

"I need to relax? Oh, you'd love that, wouldn't you?"

'My old man always used to say we eventually get the face we deserve. I wish I'd listened to him!'

1st Place in the Egg and Spoon Race

'Does your phone have a scanner thingy? I've got a barcode on my butt if you want my number.'

Congratulations for male runner

"I do my best thinking in the shower... do I need to run 5 miles a day in order to take one?"

A number of runners run through police tape.

'Well, did you win or what?'