Quitting A Job Pillows

"I've decided to leave the company. Could I have my soul back?"

"I told him that I was leaving, that I couldn't put up with the endless stream of meaningless paperwork...he asked me to fill out an exit report!"

"I told him that I was leaving that I couldn't put up with the endless papaerwork..." "And what did he say?" "He asked me to fill out an exit report."

'I love being my own boss!'

"Of course you can resign Ferguson. How would you like to buy back your freedom? Cash, credit card or easy payments?"

"Oh yeah? Well, I quit my job before it was cool."

'First, I had a frog in my throat. Then I had butterflies in my stomach - and now, a cat has got my tongue, I quit.'

Gentlemen, I'm off to join the circus

When Dick quit, he walked off with the company Slushy fund!'

"I know, you've a fly in your soup. Everyone has. Today is my last day."

"If I've got to work for a tyrant . . . I may as well work for myself."

"That's the part of the exit interview the boss really enjoys!"

"In lieu of an exit interview, he just emailed a string of emojis about how he felt about the company and his boss."

'My wife was anxious because I had some drinks before, during and after work. That's why I did what must have been done - I quit the damn job.'

'This should be good. He just won the lottery!'

'This must be the day you're quiting. I saw your car parked in the boss's space.'

"I take it you're resigning, Smith"

'I warned you I wanted out!'

'Does this mean you won't be back on Monday?'

You can't fire me, because I quit. In the words of Bob Dylan, "I ain't gonna work on Maggie's Farm no more." In the words of Ray Charles, "Hit the road, Jack."

Mega Corp. Employee Exit. I know every day is a gift, but sometimes I wish it had a return policy.

It was getting worse. Bob's power suit kept wanting more and more, whereas Bob just wanted out.

"Ron didn't realise he was so popular."

'Let's keep in mind that although quitters never win, they often manage to avoid litigation.'

"Sorry, Foster, but I'm letting you go. I just downloaded the 'Scapegoat' app."

"You had the power to leave all along - just click your heels three times, grab your coat, and sneak out without saying goodbye."

"It's hard to keep good people."

Man leaving his office with his computer tangled around his leg,

'Being a nobody isn't so bad...You don't have to worry about becoming a has-been.'

"My God! There goes middle management."

'You're resigning? What great timing! I was going to lay you off friday!'

"I'm surprised, Caswell. I thought you were a happy camper."

'Let's see what the employment tribunal has to say about that, shall we?'

'Does this mean you won't be coming back on Monday?'

"The only reason I'm firing you for your suggestion is because you signed yours."