Quirky Sages T-Shirts

Man can levitate but can't hold fingers properly.

"Behold the secret to happiness."

British savings accounts

Rich man vomiting euros to a beggar.

"And on the eighth day, God sat back with a scotch and soda and waited for the critical reviews."

"You seem troubled, Pastor. Is anything worrying you...I mean aside from the sins of the world, the vanity of humankind, man's inhumanity to man..."

'I used to spring forward. Now all I can do is fall back.'

'Oh, yeah? -- Well, my true inner self can whip your true inner self!'

The older I get, the more introspective I get, or is that retrospective?'

'You say it's a dramedy? We thought it was more of a coma.'

"Pastor, may we share a message with you about humility?"

'Do you mean 'who cares what the meaning of life is,' or that 'who cares' IS the meaning of life?'

'We'll talk later, Ed, but for now we have a quick and dirty solution to your objections.'

Justice

'Stick and Carrot Business Incentive Consultants.'

The 11th Commandment

Sermon - why our religion is really better than yours.

Bishop with a crozier case.

Manspreading in Art

"My great-uncle Octavio always wore his hat in the house. That way, if bad company knocked on the door, he could say he was just leaving."

How To Cut The Defense Budget

'How am I supposed to meditate with your nose whistling?'

God finger

Greek Tragedy: 'Yes... we agree to further cuts in government spendings..!!!'

"Time heals all wounds. It also kills every living thing."

"I wish you people would just read the blog."

'They say ninety is the new eighty.'

Couldn't you have used a smaller font?

I WRITE FOR THOSE/WHO STARE OUT WINDOWS/WITH LITTLE HAIR ON THEIR TOES

Barry Cryer.

"You're confusing guilt with feelings of remorse. With remorse, you don't need a lawyer."

"...and if your friends jumped off a cliff, would you jump off a cliff?"

"You know the rules, if you can't pay my fee I shall have to eat you."

'All that we learn from history is that we don't learn from history...'

'Your honor, my client only broke into the museum because he had an art attack.'