Puzzle Ponderer Pillows

A highly decorated military officer talking to man with wearing a word game on his chest

Left and Right: Please be consistent.

'How can he have an attention deficit when he has so many nice things to hold his attention?'

'That's from the last year the data was available.'

Thinking and thinking backwards.

'Do you ever get that feeling that you're part of some gigantic cosmic jigsaw puzzle.'

"I'm in a catch-23 situation."

"Ever since I died, I don't care as much about the crossword."

'Let me through, I'm a doctor of philosophy ...'

"You know what your problem is? You think too much."

'You seem sceptical.'

Taxidermatology

"Hang on - I've forgotten the question!"

"This one looks like an ink-spill too."

'Try it. You might have beginner's luck.'

"I get confused. When someone says, 'have you no shame?', is the proper answer 'yes' or 'no'?"

'How come 'super glue' doesn't stick to the inside of the tube?'

Chicken...next exit, Egg...3 miles...or is it the other way around?

Man sees sign at fortune teller featuring mind reading and mind boggling

"He's not so clever, he thinks he's playing draughts"

Cartoon heading in the right direction.

'Rorschach! What's to become of you?'

Elevator dilemma.

The Clever Clogs Quiz: Procrastination.

Man imagines his pregnant partner as an impossible bottle.

Bizarre sights.

"What's a five letter word for mother. . . besides that!"

"Is there a God?"

"When I cross the road to get to the other side, I discover the other side, is on the other side."

"I need a five letter word that starts with 'Ca'."

'I wonder where he gets his ideas from?'

Answers to last week's brain-teasers

"No matter how many times I study it—always more and more cognizant of its anomalies and repetitions, defying all logic—I am nevertheless drawn into its bewitching spell!"

The kid who learnt about math on the street

"I have to say I quite enjoyed it at first, but now I'd like to know what's at the top."