Punting Pro T-Shirts

"Lady here wants to put £5 on Cambridge 'Each way'!"

'I do a lot of icing. It's part of my mellowness.'

Do you want to win the game or my business?

How The Sausage Is Eaten

"Personally, I'd like to hire you, Mike, but the company has some serious concerns about your core competencies!"

Businessman sees sign in window of 'Fred's Chili Bowl' restaurant: 'Now Hiring a Bean Counter'.

'Lost your ball again?' - 'No, I've got my ball. I've lost my club.'

"Okay, quote me. I'm on the record."

"YAY! FREE SHIPPING!"

James's Mayfair Gym - Punting Machine.

Self Raising Flour

'I'd never bite the hand that feeds me - but I won't pull its finger, either.'

Tee for Two!

'This has to be the longest course I've ever played!' (Sign with Gas/Food/Lodging Next Tee)

"We should have taken a eweber."

'Well done, Evan; you only missed a hole-in-one by 7 strokes.'

'If you want to improve your golf score, the best wood to use is a pencil with an eraser.'

A man holding a golf club eying up his shot

'We could have saved an awful lot of bother and just given him a shot a hole.'

Professional Cell Phone Accessories

His Other Shtick

'Did you see a ball come this way?'

'Ere Bert, what do I do with a lady who wants an each way bet on the boat race?'

'I'm the veterinarian of Cheshire who spays and neuters Cheshire pets.'

Welcome to Fairway...The town with 536 holes of golf!

Boating Reflection

Blue Tit Bank.

Golf

There Are More Things To Life Than Golf...But I Ignore Them. There are more things to life than golf...but I ignore them.

'Would it be alright if I just did a little putting?'

'What's the odds on Cheltenham going ahead?'

I've had a fantastic round, I've even got a ball left over!

Golfer's Dog Is His Caddy

Wordilly Durdillies - Unidentified frying object