Public Speaking Gifts

"Vision: It's what took a small workshop in the North Pole and turned it into the massive global enterprise we know today."

Can't Do the Math/Won't Do the Math.

"Hold everything! The P.R. department just sent over this chart."

Communication Breakdowns

"Basically, we have two options: #1: Do what I suggest because I'm the boss and I say so. Or, #2: I launch into an excruciatingly dull, long and detailed presentation explaining my position. You decide."

Blessed are the brief.

'Before our principal addresses the faculty, there's something important that has to be said.'

A Born Politician

"Before I start today's sermon let's take 5 minutes to view the highlights reel from the last 3 Sundays..."

Attention Deficit Disorder Anonymous.

"Regarding earnings guidance, as my mother used to say: 'If you can't say something nice, don't say anything'. I'll be shutting up now."

The emergence of a leader.

"Which brings us to my next point."

Overcoming Public Speaking Anxiety

Gerald sensed that more than just his reputation was riding on the success of the presentation.

A presenter with a very complex chart to explain a business plan - 'And it's as simple as that!'

'But before we move on, allow me to belabor the point even further...'

'Wow, excellent turnout.'

'Then again, if you're not very smart, it's OK to just work harder.'

Panel with Experts to be broken in case of emergency

'I sort of thought your presentation was going to be in powerpoint.'

'Well ladies and gentlemen, I'm sure my little talk has made you all think'

Ministry of Soundbites: "Actually minister, it doesn't really matter what you say as long as you include a combination of the words 'choice','empowerment' and 'customer focussed'."

'There are no stupid questions, so let's also agree there are no stupid answers.'

'I'm now going to open the floor to questions.'

'And now I would like to depart from my prepared text...'

"That concludes my prepared remarks. I will now evade your questions."

'...so the Marketing Department suggested I try a slide presentation.'

'Assuming present trends continue, the odds are quite good that we'll become the best-informed extinct species on the planet!'

"In closing, let me tell you that never in the universe have I spoken before such an attentive audience."

"I know it's just a political buzzword, but the idea of change really resonates with me."

"First, I want to give you an overview of what I will tell you over and over again during the entire presentation."

The speech was almost interesting. People began to sit up and fake interest.

'I don't understand your question. Could you restate it as an answer?'

Strictly off the record.