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'Is this one dead?'

"Remember when it was 'The Dog and Duck'?"

"He could have been the national bird, but that was a long, long time ago."

'I know it's gassy...'

City Boy.

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

Men's fragrances...

Fleeting illusions of happiness hour 5-7

'No Fred, this one is one me!'

'I'm having trouble with my drinking. Arthritis in my elbow.'

'She thinks I'm out every night training for the London Marathon.'

'Would you say your glass is half empty or half full?' 'Whose round is it?'

The Endangered Species: Your Local Pub

JOE'S 'COME ON - YOU KNOW YOU REALLY WANT IT' BAR.

Professional woman in pub

Drunken singers in a public house

'I'm looking for male bonding, but I'm a little rusty.'

The Reaper's Arms

"Your shout!"

The Cavern Club - "One for the long and winding road Mr McCartney?"

"My wife is trying to stop me doing my flamingo impression." "You must put your foot down! "

'Do not stand while the room is in motion.'

'Talking of of big tops have you seen the new barmaid at the Green Dragon?'

'He was a barman before he got into the demolition game.'

'It's your round.'

"Not quite what I meant when I said your presentation should include a bar chart."

"Excuse me - could you direct me to a grass verge..?"

'I haven't had too much at the pub - one packet of salt-and-vinegar and a cheese-and-onion.'

Let's have the cod. It'll be extinct soon.

'The Bear' pub, changed to 'The Bull.'

William Tell Overture

'It was a lot more congenial when we had happy hour.'

To tell you the truth, I find it hard to be sympathetic for the plight of the beer vampire.

'Beer? Wassat then?'

"I feel a draft."