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Cowboy Darts board: 'DRAW!'

A small snooker player chalking his cue.

"He could have been the national bird, but that was a long, long time ago."

'I know it's gassy...'

City Boy.

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

Men's fragrances...

'I like you, you've got balls.'

Fleeting illusions of happiness hour 5-7

'I'm having trouble with my drinking. Arthritis in my elbow.'

"What's a nice girl like you doing in a bubble like this?"

'No Fred, this one is one me!'

'She thinks I'm out every night training for the London Marathon.'

'Would you say your glass is half empty or half full?' 'Whose round is it?'

'All right!! Bull's-eye!'

The Endangered Species: Your Local Pub

"And you've had this headache since you left the pub last night?"

"Think I'll be a more effective alpha male if I learn to play pool?"

Professional woman in pub

JOE'S 'COME ON - YOU KNOW YOU REALLY WANT IT' BAR.

Drunken singers in a public house

'I'm looking for male bonding, but I'm a little rusty.'

The Reaper's Arms

'He was a barman before he got into the demolition game.'

"Your shout!"

The Cavern Club - "One for the long and winding road Mr McCartney?"

"My wife is trying to stop me doing my flamingo impression." "You must put your foot down! "

'Talking of of big tops have you seen the new barmaid at the Green Dragon?'

'Do not stand while the room is in motion.'

". . . so a duck walks into a . . ."

"Not quite what I meant when I said your presentation should include a bar chart."

Let's have the cod. It'll be extinct soon.

'The Bear' pub, changed to 'The Bull.'

'It was a lot more congenial when we had happy hour.'