Psychic Powers T-Shirts

'I see a carefree lifestyle by a quiet lake. No, wait, my mistake - looks like I called up the real estate section.'

Graduation Day At Telekinesis School

Psychic car mechanics.

'I try to get through to her but all she wants to do is blend bloody spoons all day.'

'The job was as good as mine. But when they asked where I saw myself in five years, I didn't know.'

'Nice to see Celia's making something of Jeffs Psychokinesis'

"Who's there?"

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

Guy at drink stand says to Medium: 'Medium?'

The Environmentalist

'Any minute now I'll be getting a headache.'

"The sweater you knit him will be thrown out in February."

"I forsee you will have a better chance of winning the lottery than growing your testicles back."

"Why bother?"

Asking out a palm reader.

"This paw has you meeting a lovely poodle, an enchantress who will win your heart... but look, here, this is telling me she's lousy with fleas."

'... And this is Goldsmith, our futures consultant.'

Quantum Psychic

'Oh, no - I have to read each tentacle - that'll be extra, of course.'

Spiritualism: Meet the Authors.

"Tell her she's dead. I don't want to talk about the relationship."

Pet psychic -- yup, she's for real.

"I'm not sure you'll want to know this."

"You're solemates!"

"What is it? You're not wet or hungry. Mommy's not a mind reader. OK, I am, but I've never been very good at it."

Channelling on the Cheap

Using psychic powers, the final exam had been a breeze. However, Madame Evetta did not realize that the student in front of her from who she had obtained the majority of her answers, was Bugs Higgins.

Pie Filling Reader

"Finally, Miss Big-Shot calls her dead mother!"

Card Reader in PC Supplies Store.

'I see you in five years from now, you're still coming to see me. Do you want me to book the appointments in advance?'

Madame ZuZu. Dream Interpretation. Tarot. Palms. She says the dream where I'm taking a test naked means I barely made it through school.

'I can see a visit to the vet, but, oh my, no more kids after that!...'

Madame Lucille - Fortune Teller 'I predict the future'.

'If I'd known these programs were going to be so fake - I'd be psychic!'