Provocative Wordsmith T-Shirts

"You don't have to talk dirty to me. Politically incorrect talk will do it."

Unforgettable, that's what you are... Gnat King Cole

Reading my Critics

To no ones surprise, they ran head-on into one another. (All couples are wearing teachers reading 'I'm with Stupid'.)

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

"Oh, sorry - Open Sesame, PLEASE."

My other car has a bumper sticker that says this on it too.

"Let's see. Seuss... Seuss... Here we go. That's a medium box of bagels and lox and a pop on the rocks by seven o' clock."

Shakespeare loved a grammar joke

Spiritualism: Meet the Authors.

"Right now, grandmom's bark is definitely worse than her bite!"

'Did you really mean both me and a hippopotamus evolved from a tiny blob in the ocean?'

'Actually, I don't get out much. I spend most of my time alone, writing lyrical novels celebrating nature and the interconnectedness of all living things!'

I said, your bones ache because you’re old. I’m referring you to an archaeologist.

Best Seller

"Remorse sits in my stomach like a piece of stale bread. How does that sound?"

"He belongs to a lawyer."

'To err is human... but to forgive is against company policy!'

'It's okay sir, I'm private Johnson.'

Mother Goose's Haiku

Writing the poem was easy: there are lots of words rhyming with "snow"...

Dear Author: We really are tickled by your persistence. Sincerely, The Editors.

A Poet

You trip on it, you buy it.

Olden Day Battle of the Bands (Bard vs Sonnet).

Shakespeare Ave

'He never listened to his mother!'

"What's 'ET' short for. . . ?"

"I love you a bushel and a peck. How else?"

Sharp Eyes

"I got into the coffee for the wordplay."