Provocative Strategist Gifts

"Carl can write some vicious attack ads, but first you gotta poke him with a stick."

'How do you like my fantasy weekend so far?'

'She'll never look for me here.'

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

'You both know the rules -- walk 1 paces, turn, and tee off on each other.'

"As the new head coach, my first move will be to blow up the entire roster."

'This will be tough. The parents can handle Bs and Cs, but I really gotta spin this D in math.'

'I am constantly diversifying my toy portfolio.'

Noughts and crosses hugging and kissing.

"Game of checkers? Okay, but I'm watching every move you make."

CX909708

'If you know what's good for you Allan, you'll let me pass.'

'No, please, go on. It's so refreshing to talk to someone with an entirely different point of view.'

BUSINESS PRESCHOOL

"I'm afraid there will be more cuts."

"This'll look great on my transcript!"

"Sign the contract first kid, then you get the sweets!"

Stun-gun target practice.

"Large destroyer on the horizon, captain."

The Limits of Satire

"Can I start getting my allowance in Lottery tickets?"

"I need backup on 'D' Wing — they've built another den!"

"Dad, I want another dog for my birthday." "NO." "OK. I want a stripper girlfriend for my birthday." "What kind of dog do you want."

'My career goals? Writing political attack ads would combine my love of blogging and bullying.'

'We like to keep old timers involved in our expansion.'

'She's a good coach, and the kids seem to like her. But I still think someone should at least run a background check.'

Dear Sadie, I suggest having a steamy, torrid love affair that other people will disappove of. Nothing can make you feel more alive than that. I know. - Kathryn from Ontario

"That's very controversial!"

'Instead of a long, expensive trial, how about we just do ‘Rock, Paper, Scissors'?'

A pirate fishes using his hook.

The Romans had never faced a bouncy castle before.

"I had a brainstorm at the Existential Marketing Seminar. What if we did nothing?"

OK, we've defined the project objectives. Now it's time to establish the stakeholders.

Trump the Banana Republican.

"Yes, it is graffiti, but I find it refreshing!"