Proud Grandma Gifts

"Mom, when you want some privacy wear this. No one will come within 20 feet of you!"

"I'm prescribing my mother for your insomnia. She'll call you tonight to talk about her grandchildren."

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

Cry babies.

Impressing dad.

"Those are the names of your children? I went a different route...I memorized my kids' names."

Children's artwork exhibition.

"Your children are adorable...and so shiny!" "Thanks. I them in dish detergent."

'Sure, a drawing on Facebook has coverage, but nothing wows the family like a spread on the fridge.'

"Mother, I think I'm good enough to exhibit on the living room walls now."

'You must be very proud Daphne.'

'Well, he's definitely got your nose...'

'I'm afraid he's at that age when he's into everything!'

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

"Isn't he the spitting image of his Dad?"

'She posted her first blog today.'

'Wow! Your kid looks a lot like you!'

"Soon you'll be sucking your thumb AND tying your shoes...they call it multitasking."

'Baby's first two-step.'

"I won it for being the most noncompetitive in preschool."

"Study her closely...the laughing eyes, the dimpled smile...she's got 'em right where she wants 'em."

'Is THIS the way you plan to spend your peak learning years?'

'It could have been worse...she might have chosen banking.'

"Oh, she talk a lot...but only about her children."

The Yummiest Mummy in the Village

'The suspense is killing us. Which one is our grandchild?'

'Dear, Junior ate his first house today!'

"We're so proud. Only 5 months old and already knows how to scroll and swipe."

"He looks just like your husband."

'Oooh, Jimmy, the teacher put another throwing star on your paper! Great!'

'It is a big day! Ten years ago, yout dad joined the union!'

"Little Lucas doesn't go anywhere without his weighted blanket."

"We're going to the park to size up the competition."

Cinderella insisted on always having glass slippers - even into old age...