Property Market Player Prints

First Time Liars.

Starter Home

'I'm sure that one wasn't there last week.'

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

"One day, my boy, all this will be retirement homes."

'You always bring me the same thing every year, toys games sports equipment. I never get what I really want!' - 'What's that?' - 'Real estate!'

'What kind of alteration did you have in mind?'

Travellers with a developer: 'I see ski slopes.'

"A home recently sold in my neighborhood."

Of course, the rent on the fourth floor is considerably higher.

"I've invested in property..."

'Son, someday this will all be yours. Or Wal-Mart's. Whoever pays Daddy the most.'

"Look, son, real estate."

'We'll convert it into flats and revitalise the area.'

"I think we could be very happy here until we aren't."

"This is Mr. Harrington, our mortgage nerd."

'I think this is deep enough for the foundations!'

"It's nice, but does it have a batcave?"

"When we said we'd build 'affordable' homes we had a particular buyer in mind."

'Your mortgage is under water...so what's the problem?'

'I can count on one hand the number of contracts that I didn't finish on time.'

"It's not so much a fixer upper as a tear it downer."

An exaggeration of estate agents

"Sold his air rights."

'Gee! You must have lost some on this property!'

"I'm a real estate developer and I'm just looking over this area."

'It started out as a little tree house for the kids and we kept adding on to it.'

Home Sweet Second Home.

"You're unlikely to find anyplace on the market that is truly impregnable."

"I've just bought five acres of prime oceanfront. Want to help me build on it?"

"I see no problems. We can get lots more of these houses in.."

'Now from this room you can get a great view of the whales going by!'

'Uh oh, I measured the lumber in feet, but you measured it in metric.'

'Now, it does require some modernisation. . . .'