Productivity Parody Lover Pillows

Efficiency Expert: Back at 3:17:03

Desk trays - 'in', 'out', and 'one of these days'.

Things-to-do-today: Daily workboxes piled up on desk.

"It's a new target to target a time to reduce targets so that we'll be less target driven!"

"Do we always have to work through lunch?"

"Gentleman I believe I've found a revolutionary new way for us to more productively waste our lives."

'It's a fake - but all the hanging around the water cooler is down 57%!'

"Give a man a job, and he'll work all day. Teach a man to delegate, and he'll take the rest of the day off."

"Ok, so you got the worm. What are you going to do with the rest of your day?"

'My multi-tasking turned into faulty-tasking.'

'I'm sorry you had to wait. My Time Management Workshop started late.'

I have plenty of work harder bees. Get me more work smarter bees.

"Miss Jones! Clear my schedule until I get this sorted out!"

"Some days, no matter how much you procrastinate, work still gets done."

'If people who have sudden ideas really had light bulbs over their heads, it would be very dark in here.'

'I need a tool to measure productivity.'

"A laptop has been installed in each rest room stall."

'I'm the CEO of a large corporation. Of course my cough is productive. Everything I do is productive.'

"Slip some performance enhancing drug into the water. We need more production!"

The other digital divide.

Drinks for the post-caffeinated economy

Beesy schedule.

'Remember, I'm doing the best you can.'

I was hoping you might convince him by demonstrating the quality of the product.

How to boost your work output...

"I start every day by making a list of the people I need to ignore."

"That must be the new 'sit-work' desk."

Tunnel of Workaholics

"I've found if I squint my eyes and frown, it looks like I'm concentrating rather than sleeping.".

Look at me multitasking. I'm shooting the breeze, checking invoices and drinking coffee.

'Good work is it's own reward, but delegation is even better.'

'Work production rose significantly once we closed all the curtains in the windows.'

'Technology is wonderful. It makes your people so much easier to use.'

Desk trays - 'Do it' and 'Do it right this time'.

"To keep on top of the work I'm going to have to put in some overtime."