Produce Pun Fan T-Shirts

"Yeah, it's all grown locally. Just not locally around here."

"‘Extra vile old ox’? No, sir – it stands for ‘extra virgin olive oil.’"

Chicken Little Inc. Pecking Order.

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozak.

KING HEROD INTERROGATES THE WISE MEN TO KNOW BABY JESUS'S WHEREABOUTS

'Justin, this isn't what I meant when I said we could make out like bandits.'

"I love finding my food at the Farmers Market. Makes me feel like a true pioneer."

Cupid misses his shot.

'That's a quack-quack'. Ornithological conference.

Office supplies - Notebooks, memo pads and rap sheets.

'All right, so you've prepared your resignation . . . let me have it!'

Snacks. Food. Drinks. Win! Play! LOTTO here! I changed my name to "Lottery Ticket" and hang out here. It's a great place to get scratched!

'You've got swine flu and I think it's begun to mutate.'

'I'm home, Honey! Come see what I picked up at the Farmers Market!'

Revenge is a dish best served cold.

"It's the closest I get to being a hunter-gatherer."

To keep cool in the summer, Victor installed a whole-house flan.

'The worst part is I'm afraid of the water.'

(Omi God! Pigs in a blanket!)

"Nothing to worry about. A nuggetectomy is a very simple procedure."

'Maybe you should try flowers?'

Arm Chair

'This is my wife Hilda, who is quite a tomato herself!'

'The side effects are headaches, sweating,nervousness, and a depressed bank account.'

'Satchel, I have a hunch...'

"Father Michael has a wicked sense of humour."

"Okay - I can see you now."

"Well yes, I could prescribe glasses, but frankly, just cutting your fringe would probably work better..."

Sir Isaac Newton discovers even more gravity.

"Keep it open."

"Note to self...'NICE APPS' is not a good opening line."

"And you say these stabbing back pains started when you got into politics?"

"I hear this place is a hotbed of international pancakes."

"I'm very proud of the grade A's, son, but what about these grade B smalls?"

'I don't think much of the punchline.'