Prison Wardens With A Sense Of Humor T-Shirts

"Really Bob? Disco?!"

"The lettuce I paid with was fresher than the lettuce I bought."

'Let's get a kitty.'

'My wife says not to worry. She's convinced she can get me out of here with coupons.'

Happy Birthday to you... Thanks guys!

When staffing agencies screw up.

"One night in a moment of rage. . . I removed a 'Do Not Remove Under Penalty of Law' tag from a pillow!"

'OVERCROWDED-I'll say it's OVERCROWDED!'

'I mistakenly thought that 'mutual' meant the funds were equally mine to use.'

"How'd you know I was in for cyber crime?"

'See, I told you it was a good idea to talk to the plants.'

Conrad Black will be unable to do his investment club's tax returns this year.

"Murder one. How about you?" "I tried to rob an arts and crafts store with a hot glue gun."

'I tried to give a woman the Heimlich maneuver, and it turned out she was doing the Macarena.'

Convict Decor

'He didn't wash his hands.'

Prison baseball game features Bankers vs. Wall Street.

Post Office fraud wing in a prison.

"Sorry I'm late, I had to do jail time."

'The SEC got me for inflating the numbers..'

'They got me for 'hate-texting.''

Bullfighter and Bull Cellmates

"I can't continue to be your lawyer if you won't show up at the hearings."

"They want to spend the weekend at Daddy's" (Colour)

'I was told to reach for the stars but when I did, I was arrested for stalking.'

Martha bakes with her new friends.

"Look on the bright side. You no longer live with your parents."

'I suppose you'd like your porridge shaken, not stirred?'

"The other gangs can give you protection. We can give you free wi-fi."

'I'm in here for something I didn't do alright-I didn't pay my Council Tax!'

'Ms. Daly, have there been any important e-mails or voice-mails during my incarceration?'

All I'm saying is, the next time you go for a perp walk, I'd like to be included.

"I've sent last minute treatments to all the major studios."

'There's a rumour we're all going to be released and forced to join the NFL.'

'Some gagwriter you turned out to be!'