Price Wrangler Pillows

'Just when I can make ends meet, you move the ends.'

"They've given me the Lion's share of budgetary constraints."

High Riders of the Old West

"I've outgrown my backpack."

"Excuse me, but I believe you are in my seat."

Excess Baggage: Before starting your rental car, be sure the radio is turned all the way down.

'Hold on there Jethro! You know I don't tolerate that kind of horseplay in this joint.'

"Will you stop saying 'ouch' every time I cut something out of your budget?"

Since we've remodeled, you are no longer here.

You have 10 updates, 6 slow your PC down, 3 look very dodgy, 1 randomly changes all your PC settings!

'Did you want me, boss?'

'Any stunt driving experience other than teaching three teen-agers to drive?'

"This horse comes with all the hardware necessary to be fully autonomous."

'I told you he had a temper.'

Boss: '...Let's not forget who our customers are!' (It turns out they just have one left).

"What's the problem Cowboy? Never heard of Cattle Driving before?"

"Say, Bart. Break out that ol’ Harmonica App."

"I got whiplash when I recoiled from your quote."

'Ooo, two strays to add to the database.'

"The $350 we received to stimulate the economy is still missing..."

Low rates!

"It's broken I'm afraid." "Will I be able to work?" "Depends. What do you do?" "Oh, I'm just a cowpoke for Circle 'Y' Ranch."

It's folks like Mildred who make collectibles collectable!

"I need to take a call. Argue amongst yourselves."

'Ever wish we were back on Wall Street?'

"No one is making you do anything you don't want. I'm just saying we're all headed for Dodge City and we think you should come along."

"...and then the heroic young investor managed to capture the evil high interest rate monster and wrestled him down until he was a mere 5.25%!"

"Wait a minute, that's my bar code" Product Identity Theft

'Do you have this in a smaller size?' - 'Is she nuts! She's way too big for that size. She'll destroy it if she tries it on...but if I don't answer her soon she'll destroy me...'

"Your tests are back. We've ruled out anything covered by your HMO."

Teacher said the C's she put face up indicate slight improvement.

District Budget Meeting: Asprin

"Here, I'll call the credit department for you...you might wanna push 'seven' on here."

Sales Clerk tricks woman into an instant merchandise exchange.

"Looks like we'll be walking today. The horses are staging a sit in."