Preventative Care Enthusiast Pillows

Flu Shot

'I checked the database, Mrs. Nimitz. There's no such symptom.'

You only have time for one: Choose your fighter - Exercise, Wash Your Hair, Eat, Breathe

"What's that mark on your arm, Mama?"

"When I grow up, I want to go into medicine and help people who can pay out of pocket."

'What's wrong with me, Doctor?' 'I have no idea! That information comes within doctor-patient confidentiality.'

'I asked if you were affiliated with an HMO not a UFO.'

"I hope you don't mind - I'm training a brand-new assistant and I've asked her to check your blood pressure."

"You only need one prescription. The other 7 are for the side effects."

"As soon as your dentist gets here, we'll begin."

"So you're interested in medicine, public relations, business, contract negotiations and insurance law? Which one will you study in school?"

"I hear he's taking an experimental drug called, 'It Ain't Over Till It's Over.'"

What will the little one be? Epidemiologist? Virologist? PPE manufacturer?

Healthy Patients Only

Get well soon!

Shampoo and Salad Dressing.

An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of insurance forms.

Preventive medicine.

'It's an emergency, Doctor. The vitamin company needs an endorsement.'

Zika global alert

"You call all this a side effect?"

'We're trying to use a team approach to medicine, but we're having trouble fitting everyone!'

'Gastroenterology...do I know that?'

Eye, ear, nose, throat & real estate investment trusts.

'Thanks for inviting me to dinner - it's really great!'

'There, we're up and running! Let the logging in begin. . .'

Drug vending machines at hospital.

'Doc, my stiches are coming out,'

'What's this? You're suing me because the prescribed medication made you 'irrationally exuberant' in a down market?'

"It's called being preemptive."

"I'll bet he takes other dangerous drugs too! See if we can catch him with an aspirin!"

'I would have been here sooner, if not for a wonderful, caring, competent doctor.'

"I'm sorry, but it's just not going to work out between us. We're contraindicated."

'Looks like a perfectly healthy limb to me.'

'You forgot you list of possible side-effects.'