Presentation Guru Pillows

Can't Do the Math/Won't Do the Math.

"The trend in tough economic times is to put off everything that doesn't require immediate action ? as this chart shows."

'...so the Marketing Department suggested I try a slide presentation.'

'Your presentation on the advantages of e-commerce would've been better had it not been for the use of the word 'dude' 183 times.'

Flowcharts.

'Norman needed some help with his presentation technique'

'Yes, I agree. But what really caught my attention is what the boss ISN'T saying!'

'He has a very open mind. Everything goes in one ear and out the other.'

'This PowerPoint slide has a dynamic layout comparing reading scores throughout the district, which you would have seen if I remembered to bring a spare projection bulb.'

"Does anyone have any questions? Don't be shy...anyone? Come on folks!"

"We must avoid jargon if we truly wish to empower our clients..."

'When I wake up, remind me to give you a few tips on how to make your presentations a little more dynamic.'

"I love Powerpoint, all you do is stand in front of your audience and read out all the slides. Job done."

"It's all about presentation. Drizzle something on this idea and the boss might not realize it's half-baked."

Pie Charts.

'I've taken the liberty of simplifying the latest data.'

"The bar charts show out clients overwhelmingly prefer pie charts."

Presentation Skills: 1. Preparation

"Now that I have everyone's attention..."

'Nice presentation, but lighten up on the self-deprecating humor.'

The number one injury in today's workplace: severe bends caused by repeated exposure to deep-dive presentations.

"I'll need some distracting hilarity on the borders of my quarterly report."

Darren realised that his presentation was going to be shorter than he had planned.

"While you make the sales presentation, Monica. I'll scope out the room and try to identify this company's Achilles heel!"

He began with an anecdote, spoke off the cuff, digressed from an aside, and flew off on a tangent.

Meow Presentation

"Admit it, you didn't prepare your slide presentation, did you?"

'Great visual support.'

'I wish we could afford a proper video presentation.'

'We look at new product presentations as elaborate rituals.'

'Whoops - school boy error!'

'This time don't refer to the product brochure as a bad boy.'

We can't even afford a proper video presentation.

'I think he's given up on the clicker altogether.'

He needs Powerpoint or something.