Prehistoric Palate Enthusiast T-Shirts

I asked a lady if she wanted to grab a kale smoothie with me. She totally ignored me. Of course she did. Very few ladies are interested in a guy who latches on to the latest fads. It suggests you've got a roving eye, and you'll leave her for someone new later on. Most women like a man who's "classic." Solid. Reliable. Unmoved by the ever-changing winds. That's why I eat nothing but nuts, berries and hippos. If it was good enough for the cavemen, it's good enough for me. I thought cavemen ate bro

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

The first car accident.

"If we only used bigger clubs we would defeat our enemies every time, and we would dominate them forever!"

'Every night it's the same - always my turn to put the Bally Cat out!'

The discovery of asparagus.

"He's such a fussy eater."

Those Were The Days

Caveman has a good idea for the wheel.

"No - you’re right. It’s dumb."

If humans instead of dinosaurs had lived when the big asteroid hit.

"Daddy's working from home today."

"The invention of taxidermy."

'Alphabet soup? What's alphabet?'

Big Rock University. Guidance Counselor. I'd like to switch my major from hunting to gathering!

"My dad can't talk yet, but he's learned to wave bye-bye."

"I told you a firecracker behind his back didn't seem like a good idea!"

"Look! Other people. We'll have to develop a foreign policy!"

'We unfortunately had to compress our dinosaur area due to budget cuts. On the bright side, TyrannoTriStegoApatoHadroPlesioSaurodon Rex here is now the museum's most popular exhibit.'

"I like it but does it get only the one channel?"

The First Kite

Early man wasn't exactly enthusiastic about the development of language.

"Say, Honey, how about a nice salad for supper instead?"

"I'd like you to see an Anthropologist.''

'Dear, couldn't you spend part of your time actually hunting something?'

'Of course, I'm not one of those glamorous paleontologists who are all over TV these days.'

'Why is it always me that has to put the cat out?'

Sober Tooth Tiger

We never got anything done around here until we invented verbs.

"You'll find that as a restaurateur I've worked hard to showcase the finest in organic and free range ingredients that have been harvested and prepared in authentic and traditional ways."

"...One careful owner, not much mileage. In fact, I only invented it last week."

"According to your resume, you've done nothing of any real significance since inventing the wheel."

'Dad, can I borrow the club tonight?'

Bowling - The Early Years. This game will never catch on --- it's too hard on the goalie.

Early cave painters