Prayer Coordinator Pillows

'Let's see,,, You're answering prayers until 9:30,, Your Armageddon meeting's been pushed to 2:00 and it looks like your speaking engagement in Mrs, Ingersol's head is postponed 'til Thursday,'

Grace For Flies

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

A child interrupting family prayers

'Minyan Man! You've saved the day again!'

I'm sorry, all our angels are busy at the moment. Please hold and your prayers will be answered in the order it was received.

"Coronavirus, masks requirements, falling test scores, student violence - we need to be able to pray in school!"

'And thanks be to the lord that we're going out to eat on Friday...'

Praying mantis.

'Santa is the delivery man, I'm the CEO. Do you know what a CEO is, Lisa?'

'You're my economic advisor. What'll I do?'

Saying Grace.

The Aisle

"...and thank you for sending my guardian angel to protect me from that truck today..."

"So that's five for bailing, and three for patching. If there are no objections, the chair will now hear arguments."

"What better way to start your day than to eat and pray before we play!"

"Bob, you've been warned before. You can't come to prayer just to gather gossip material."

'You've got plenty of time for a little prayer before you get to him.'

"If I ask you something, will you promise not to get mad?"

'This is the Rabbi's favourite.'

And cut down on the praying if you want the housemaid's knee to go...

Holy phone

'I'm about to say my prayers, Dad. Do you want more pocket money too?'

"...and help my parents to pick the right mutual funds in my portfolio for my education..."

Give Thanks.

'He made it big in the athlete prayer industry.'

How to Succeed in Business - Strategy 2: Build relationships at the highest level.

'I've been praying for a revelation, but nothing happens!'

"Sometimes, God deserves a standing ovation."

"All of my manifestations are currently busy however your prayer is important to me so please..."

Woman tries to pray for the rain to end.

"What are you cooking for Thanksgiving, Tia Carmen?"

'I'm not asking anything for me but would you indicate to me as to whether you are bullish or bearish?'

'I didn't realize my mom thought so much of our school. . . she's been thanking God for it everyday lately.'

"That, my son, is where the store all the minutes of all the last meetings."