Prankster Parent Gifts

'Last year my kids put a sign on my back, but tomorrow, on April Fools Day, I'll be ready, they won't get me again.'

Darling, you should have asked me to put sun tan lotion on your back and not the kids!

'Do me a favour,son-go traumatise your mother!'

'What did the kids do now?!'

'I thought you went to school.'

'Dad! What time is it when the big hand is on eight and the little hand is all over the floor?'

Mother goosing her young son.

'You did that on purpose!'

'A generous layer of vaseline makes an excellent tickle repellent!'

'Hey, I think my parents fooled me. This game is called 'Algebra Hero'.'

'We're playing trampoline, mom.'

"No! I am your father!" "Noooooo!"

"He looks like you, and he isn't even born yet."

"Congratulations, Mr and Mrs Starmer. It's a tool!"

"Guess who figured how to call 911!"

Kid about scratched up car to dad: 'I made a mistake washing the car with a brillo pad.'

Wait – is that your dad? Tunnel of Love.

"I'm too old for a baby-sitter. How about hanging a portrait with the eyes that always seem to look at you?"

"You want me to explain how there were two doughnuts in the larder and now there is only one? Easy, it was too dark in there to see the second one."

It is always something whenever Grandmother watches little Louis.

'This not exactly what I had in mind when I told him about the birds and the bees.'

'Okay...now watch what happens when I extend my claws.'

'I'm not looking for treasure. I'm trying to find where I buried Dad.'

'Daddy! Are you using the number forty clipper?'

"We should get a lot of money from the tooth fairy. I set out grandpa's false teeth!"

"I don't get it, Susan... I've been an obstetrician for 20 years and I've never had a baby named after me!"

'I've only just learned to read, and I'm already on page twelve of my sister's diary.'

'If you find any loose ones, I have dibs on them for the tooth fairy.'

Yes, we have a 'Happy Meal'. It's when you leave the kids home.

Spider Preschool.

Ask me about Naming Rights.

"Doing chores is very stimulating. I'm always thinking of ways to avoid them."

How to avoid a heart attack.

'Today, dad has cooked and we're well prepared!'

'I fixed the dent in the bumper.'