Potato Punster T-Shirts

After 10 years, the great potato race of 1997 was finally declared a tie.

'Oh, a fries guy, huh?'

''ere - I thought you said your pans were non-stick!'

Night of the Latkes

"I'm new here. How much do we leave for a tip?"

'Iguana know what time it is.'

"He refuses to talk and he never listens."

Pet Cemetery.

'I'm going to try that 'vegan' thing, Joe -- give me some beer nuts.'

Dog Walker

'She loves me, she loves me not, she loves me...'

Standings: Milky Way Conference

"Damn! Someone just asked for chicken drumsticks."

'This is taking too long - we'll have to induce hatching.'

Atlas working out with the earth as his exercise ball.

"Mum, what is a nugget?"

Prize vegetables with rude names.

"Hallelujah!"

"Actually, There's a lot less pressure since I've gone from his best friend to his therapy dog."

Technical Terms Explained: Suckers.

'It had taken some time, but the finding of a spaghetti junction brought immense satisfaction.'

A-Hem! I'm still singing here!

Chicken Funeral Planning.

'Ah, here's your problem - all this spaghetti is real spaghetti.'

"I'm afraid there will be more cuts."

Sure, Jupiter's the biggest, but I hear he uses Asteroids to build up his bulk!

Licker Store

"Tell me, is a single spaghetti a spaghetus or what?"

"Yes, sir, it's Houstonia Michauxii and it prefers shade or semi-shade."

'Maybe you should try flowers?'

'Don't worry, I would never tell the other free range chickens you're agoraphobic.'

They just found two more dark moons around Uranus. Are you winding up to some sort of sophomoric joke? No, they really do think they found two new moons there. Kind of suspicious, if you ask me. As long as I can remember, Uranus had 27 moons, and the Solar System had 9 planets, including Pluto. Now those numbers change all the time. Next thing you know, they'll be telling us we have to Uranuses. Yeah ... pretty sure you're winding up to some sort of sophomoric joke.

'Ah look, what a lovely tortoise shell cat.'

The vegan hunter

"Cooky was askin' about you again."