Potato Humorist Mugs

Potato Funeral Planning

"It's how he would have wanted to go."

Night of the Latkes

'You have a strawberry on your nose, I'll give you some cream to put on it!'

"War is hell and so is this soup."

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

"I feel like we are the polyester of dairy products."

Herbophiles protest mass killings of plants.

"I'll have the spaghetti, does that come on toast?"

'I think it's more than a coincidence that I discover fire, and my wife discovers burnt food on the same day.'

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."

Garlic Free Zone.

"The salad should be delicious. We ordered it with lots of extra bacon bits."

"Waiter, there's a hare in my salad!"

'I told you it wouldn't work.'

'I take it that the birthday cake is for this old trout you just served me?'

'Just sitting around letting advertisers brainwash me. What about you?'

Conference Pears

'Look, I know it's artificial orange, but you're sick, I say, sick.'

"What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!"

'Remember to eat your 500,000 a day son!'

"If we crunch the numbers, it should have zero calories."

Cupcake jumps out of cake.

'Well you said you wanted sushi for lunch.'

'Mustard, ketchup and mayo are all nice and creamy smooth. Why isn't anything being done about relish?'

The leaning tower of Pizza.

"The vegetables have gone bad!"

"Cut down on the pumpkin spice."

"I'm starving! How long will dinner be?"

"I just explained 'kugel' to him."

"I'm having friends over for dominoes, so everyone needs to clear out of the kitchen."