Post-shopping Philosopher Prints

Once again, "Black Friday" has led to "in-the-red" Saturday. Credit statement.

"I shop, therefore I am."

"You don't whisper anymore."

Only One Item or Fewer.

Hello, this is Cable News. Oh. I'm Mortimer Park. As you know, we only have four short years until the next presidential election. So it's time to start asking: Who should run? Whom do you prefer? (A) Al Gore … (B) John Kerry … (C) Marco Rubio … (D) Ted Cruz ... (E) Christ Christie ... House of Java Cybercafe. How about (F) You? Mr. Eugene Yu is actually (T).

"Oh, don't mind that, it's just my body of unseen work."

"You want to grow a ponytail? OK...as long as it's not from hair growing out of your ears."

"What would you suggest to fill the dark, empty spaces in my soul?"

Quadruple dark hot chocolate. Whoa, everything all right? Sure, yeah, great. I'm a journalist and writer in an era in which the printed word has been totally devalued by free distribution of information on the internet. Can I pay in prose? Point taken.

"I'm having second thoughts about those damn school uniforms."

"Sugar, trans fats, and an adorable dead baby lamb. Cash back?"

Unbeknown to others, Thoreau would sometimes, in the middle of the night, sneak out for a few odds and ends.

Continental Drift.

'Are you sure this isn't the point in which we should stop following the invisible hand of the marketplace?'

Cash Rebate

"We're a monopolyopoly. Our company that owns 13 subsidiaries which put on a darn good imitation of competition."

"Who's next?"

...Five ways for the cities-towns to raise money...

Self- Checkout. I never use those lanes ... I get enough of that in therapy.

"Is that what you're wearing?"

"I can see the green shoots of recovery. The fag butts are getting longer."

'Malcolm is unswayed by post-foundationalist trendiness.'

"I often think of the 'Hereafter'. When I'm shopping I'm always asking myself 'What am I here after?'"

"I take it this is why it's called Brickview Estates."

'I'm the same as you - too sick to go into work, but well enough to go shopping!'

Style

"They want to turn the clocks back?"

I have to admit, I enjoyed that fruity concoction you convinced me to try. In light of that, I will extend to you a brief respite from my usually relentless attacks upon your character.

"The most moral consumer - Didn't shop at Walmart - Didn't order things on Amazon unless it was, like, an emergency - Tried to be vegan - Always had an extra canvas bag in her car (which was a hybrid, by the way)"

Shopper reading Shopenhauer in bookshop

Waiting for Petraeus

'Are you going to keep that silly mustache for all eternity?'

'Every Age has its vision of beauty.'

End Of Consumer Confidence Sale

Irregular Fruits and Veggies: "It's our inner beauty that counts..."