Post-match Philosopher T-Shirts

Sportscasters: "This could have been a different game..."

"Good game."

"Break his third chakra!" "Knock the dharma out of him!"

"The way he stacks those blocks, I see repression, some hostility, and a lot of dissatisfaction with his place in society."

'I know I'm still in the Juniors, but I already need a therapist.'

'Is THIS the way you plan to spend your peak learning years?'

"You're missing the whole gestalt of Frisbee!"

Philosopher trading cards.

"You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!"

Kids playing with the cardboard box instead of the expensive toys.

"I believe in the carrot-and-stick approach, Dempsey."

'I read that the ball is on the surface of the club for just 0.00035 of a second, so even when you take 100 shots to go around, you are only getting less than 1 second of golf for your money...'

'We're in a hurry.'

"Yin and Yankee fan"

'Aw, come on guys - at the end of the day, it's only a game - right?'

"This song is dedicated to all of you who have been having a hard time deciding between the big bang and steady state theories."

"You have a good lie."

"Sure, Pop, I see the ball—what I don't see are incentives."

"How do you know he was offsides? How do you know anything? Isn’t it possible this is all a dream?!"

God playing with dolls.

"I work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to resign."

'Looks like I might have to rethink the football idea!'

You Don't Know What It's Like

"I'll throw around the 'old pigskin' as long as the pig isn't still in it."

Coulda Woulda Shoulda.

'Violence solves everything...'

...'So I said forget about the wages, I just want to play football.'

MAN OF THE YEAR, 'You must come here a lot.'

"Just fetch, don't ask why."

'I will need to watch the replay.'

"I dreamed my parents were still alive."

The Thinking Man's Rugby

"I'm knackered trying to keep tabs on the potential consequences of the away goal rule!"

'Get over it, Brady. Pitchers at this level are expected to get batters out. Randy there gave up eight runs in one inning...'

"Sorry, I don't know what a handball is anymore either."