Portrait Collector Gifts

Elizabeth II

'Don't give me any wrinkles.'

"Interesting. You're becoming a landscape."

'It's the wife!.... I hung it there to keep the kids away from the fire!'

'You're messing with my head.'

Donald Trump painting

Robert Charles Durman Mitchum caricature

Cariactures

'The way the eyes follow you is uncanny.'

'The portrait is a mark of his extreme egotism, but, if you curtsy and bow sufficiently...say, 'Oh Yes Sir!'!, to everything he says, you should do OK'

"You're my Mona Lisa."

"And that's General Ambrose T. Spangler. He died in the Great Mustache Fire of 1897."

'Oh don't listen to him! Norman wasn't a motivational guru... he was just that cat in those silly 'hang in there' posters.'

Photos of Queen Elizabeth II

Framed Lady

"I've considered portraiture, but everyone is so ugly."

"...and yet it doesn't quite capture his thoughtful, contemplative side."

Diego Velasquez

"Stop complaining and smile! It's a job, isn't it? NO wonder they call you Mona!"

Mythical Family of Four.

El Greco

"Great photo."

'Could you tone down the smile just a little?'

A bill poster pasting up a wanted poster of himself.

Rembrandt's Selfies

"And that's me as a shepherdess!"

'One of my forebears.'

Michelangelo Buonarroti.

Phoebe Mary Waller-Bridge caricature

Portrait artist drawing DNA patterns.

AUGUSTUS JOHN

"You got better-looking as you got older—up to a point."

'Well, you're not Michaelangelo!'

'Curses! My eyes were closed.'

Smiley Face.