Pool Rejector T-Shirts

'If there's a pool, we're not interested: We would never use it!'

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

'Harold, when was the last time you cleaned the pool?!'

"Like I could date a guy from Notre Dame."

Menu Dating

Gondolier skimming up leaves in pool.

"It's about the murder of an editor who refuses to publish a writer's work..."

'You can't fire me! -- This is a right-to-work state!'

Beginning Yarder.

A gondolier clears leaves form a pool

Turkey going away for Christmas.

'Hold the Ferguson report. Ed's had enough information for the day.'

"Dude, you gotta get out here and clean this pool more often."

'Yo! No cannonballs!'

'You're overprotective, Mother.'

'Y'know you could clean out the pool once in a while.'

"Will you stop doing that please? Isn't it obvious to you that I just don't fancy him?!"

'Do I look as though I want to play Monopoly?'

Throwing Away Music

'The Vicar's kindly offered to clean the pool.'

Woman aims pepper spray at man who tries to kiss her using mistletoe.

'Use a basket? That's too much trouble.'

'How elaborate. Most women who don't want to go out with me just say no.'

"Sorry, I'm not into heavy metal."

"No, I don't want to do it 'neath the tree."

'Hi, didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?'

"An office job would drive me crazy!...sitting at a desk all day!"

'I needed a lot more house than my husband did.'

Ace Pool Cleaners.

"Hang on a minute, I'm about to go into a tunnel ..."

"Can you check the filter? I think it's clogged with dog hair."

"The short answer is no. The long answer is noooooooooooooo."