Pooch Parents Gifts

"Yeah, I don't like this part either."

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

Lady taking her little dog to the chemist with a cough

"No no, I said sit!!"

A large leaf falling on a dog

"When I first arrived, Young Master was always with me and Old Master didn't want anything to do with me, nor it's the opposite: Go figure..."

'I know he doesn't like this house, but he'll just have to get used to it.'

"There's something about ripping the stuffing out of a toy that turns me into a wild dog. I'm afraid I actually like that feeling."

"We've found a marvelous trainer for Rex."

'He rides in the car with his head out the window a lot.'

No Soliciting

'Guess who just graduated cum laude from Sunnydale Obedience School?'

"Don't even think about it."

Litterary Dogs.

"I'm getting cinnamon, brandy, nutmeg, a hint of Alsatian."

"First they taught me how to pee on the newspaper. Then they taught me how to fetch it. I reversed the sequence by accident and I've been out here since."

Dog Wrestling.

'Max and I have a give and take relationship. He sniffs my butt...and I let him.'

"Petting, fetching, receiving belly rubs . . . It all adds to your billable hours."

"I've been calling, but he's not picking up."

'HEEL!...HEEL!'

'Sorry Ben, I never noticed the baby-sitting clause in the stud contract.'

'Sure, I could be independent, but it's so much nicer to allow myself to be spoiled rotten by Mistress...'

"No you, he called you a lap dog."

'Senior Cat Warranty, Low maintenance sofa accessory, Unlimited purring and cuddling, Mellow 'been there done that' attitude.'

'He's barking mad!'

"We should probably stop calling each other 'Fluffy's person' and 'Fifi's person' and learn each other's real names - now that we're married I mean."

Good Dog!

Public toiletsbathrooms for dogs using fire hydrants in cubicals.

"Actually, There's a lot less pressure since I've gone from his best friend to his therapy dog."

'How many times have I told you to stay out of the cemetery?'

Pets on holiday.

"Yes, they've hired a professional dog-walker! Frankly, I would have preferred a dog-runner or at least a ball or stick thrower..."

The Perils of Dog Kisses

"English: Walk?" "Dog hears: Edibles on the sidewalk!"