Political Wizards T-Shirts

But if we vote for less government, we'll be out of a job!'

Micro Psychiatry Clinic. You have a full schedule today, Doctor. The helium atom will be here to work on his fear of heights. The white blood cell with a germ phobia and amoeba with separation anxiety are coming in. The DNA molecule will be here about an identity crisis. And here, in the sports car, comes a new patient, a carbon-14 isotope. Ah, looks like he's going through a half-life crisis!

Nerd tryouts.

"What's your project for the science fair, Arnold?"

"Baldo, you're a very good artist! You should put your talent to use."

Miss America IQ Pageant

'The cutbacks begin to affect wizards.'

"This realm isn't big enough for both of our killer outfits."

'31 years in graphic design eh, so I shouldn't be surprised you've retouched your photo on your CV.'

". . . so, all I really need to do is change one word."

"Fair's fair. I cooked the dinner, so you can clean the cauldron!"

'There are two types of alchemy - there's organic and there's inorganic.'

'You have received a grant from the king - his secret incantation to chant over your experiments.'

UBLIC RELATIONS IN CASE OF EMERGENCY BREAK GLASS

Remember, honey, abracadabra doesn't work anymore. Now it's command, option, shift.

"Victims of out-sorcery."

"I was doing well in school and planning to be a computer programmer - but somewhere along the way I must have taken a wrong turn."

"What a load of hocus-pocus!"

'When I registered for this class, in computer programming, nobody told me that it's all about converting caffeine into computer code.'

Computer operator welding machine.

'Here, William, take this - the G8 has chosen you to nip over for a one-to-one with Assad...'

"Since my divorce I thought I'd never laugh again. Then I noticed your toupee."

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

'Between you and me Wizard, is it true that you intellectuals have pointed heads?'

Political Issues

When he was between Executive Assistants, filing became a challenge for Jonathan.

'I think I set the security level, on my anti virus software, too high. Whenever I access anything it is automatically deleted.'

Merlin realizes too late that he shouldn't be hexing while driving.

Conference Room. I don't have the heart to tell him it wasn't a compliment when the boss said "in every brainstorming session Ernie is a ray of sunshine."

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

"If you could have a dinner conversation with someone, living or dead, who would it be?"

'Always the wise guy.'

The new US Embassy in London is conceived as a solar collector, with pillow like panels of high-tech plastic and photovoltaic cells....and emegency vertical takeoff capability,

Russian and Chinese Influences in Afghanistan

"Okay brother Bickle, you can keep your underpants on"