Plastic Product Collector Mugs

I heard oil companies just discovered huge reservoirs of oil way under the ground, all around our town. But they can't get at it because President Obama declared the whole region a national monument before he left. Why would he do that? Doesn't he know we use oil to make plastic, and that my Playstation is totally made of plastic? What happens of I ever need to buy a fourth Playstation 4? He's endangering my supply just to save a bunch of trees and mountains and waterfalls and endangered bearico

Happy Holidays from Sanitary Claus!

You're telling me not to choose sides between Google and Apple. Precisely. Computer Villa. Stay neutral. Continue to support both companies. Emotionally. Right. By buying as much as you can from both companies. Doesn't that only benefit you? Heretic. Absolve yourself by upgrading your phone! Computer Villa.

'Actually, a broken arm is not such a big handicap for me...'

"Number 2. Step forward please."

'This must be heaven, because you sure look like an angel....'

"I feel bad for the companies that make lipstick."

"Oh, don't mind that, it's just my body of unseen work."

OMG UR HOT

Tree's Tree Nursery. Get this. Dad is selling those goofy upside-down tomato planters. What idiot would buy them? Thanks! I'll let you know how it works! My idiotic bio teacher.

As you like it - One way of catching fish

"And that's me as a shepherdess!"

This is not what I had in mind when I joined the Council!

'Miss Wilson, get on the web and find me everything on bottles!'

"'You're the reason I crossed the road'? Really?! Is that your best pick-up line?"

Evolution of the Cat.

"I just got a Trump alert with my discount code off my next purchase of Trump baseball caps."

Joan Collins

"He thinks he's located a World War I torpedo boat. What's exciting at your house?"

'I'm walking across the nation to raise awareness of my fabulous legs.'

For the new gardener.

"Come on, Baldo...get up. It's twenty to eleven."

'It's a Sam Shepard play with the usual props - burnt toast, live animals, and a penis or two.'

"We offer video games, snacks, t-shirts, coffee mugs, beer and wine. Oh, and we also we have a movie."

"Call it vanity, call it narcissism, call it egomania. I love you."

'I think we need some more baking soda, dear.'

Lipstick hiccups

Texas Chainsaw Mascara

'Another mirage! First the bin lorry, and now this.'

'Just checking Sid - Are England flags Grey bin or Green bin?'

' I thought we had six fish in the livewell.'

What do you want in a lipstick Chocolate flavouring, cellulite burning enzymes and an alcohol content of 40

'Huh! There goes Sunday lunch!'

Well, shoot. If we lose, what are we going to do with all this merch we had printed up? 1549 Regional Champs.

Vlad The Impaler's Descendants,