Plane Hopper T-Shirts

"We are now boarding priority travellers. Please be ready to present an air of entitlement."

Club Antisocial

"It's a postmodern mosaic, almost lyrical in its undercurrent." "My five-year-old will be happy to hear that."

'It's nothing serious. Rest is the best cure for binge shopping.'

Excess Baggage: When you are on a cruise and they say the ship leaves at 5:30, they really mean the ship leaves at 5:30.

There is no hurricane season in Aruba...

Rodin's Cloakroom Thief

'Must be the lesser known Easter Egg Island.'

Nature Lovers

"You sure you guys don't spike the coffee?"

"Don't blame me, you're the one who suggested an island-hopping holiday!"

"I read 'Art News.'"

"It's wonderful, darling. It really says Manhattan."

"Definitive." "Compelling." "Persuasive." "Upside down."

Anyone would think it's Frieze week...

"It has great depth, realized with such a unique economy of paint application... yet, there remains a curious aura of drivel I can't dismiss."

"At this time I'd like to welcome our gold-medallion passengers on board."

'It is so nice to be able to take a break mid trip...'

"I like it, Julian — it speaks to what a waste of time and money your MFA was."

"He's left out the staples"

Easter Island moai as cocktails.

"If that were a Jasper Johns, dear, we could sell it for three million dollars."

"It's a great work!"

Man getting hot looking at picture of desert.

"I'm not the only one who hates you changing the channel every second. Now when you want to watch TV, the remote escapes."

"This one has nicer sand, but I think I prefer the tree on the last one we saw."

'I have nothing to declare... Okay, I liked Maui better.'

'Two for French Polynesia.'

'Going 'cold turkey' might be dangerous...I'd wean him off by letting him watch world cup re-runs....'

As you like it - One way of catching fish

"This artist's very successful. And he's not even dead."

"Those old guys really had it!"